Rita Ashley, Career Coach. Field tested advice for executives.

Leaving the $100,000+ job requires finesse. Why? Because every single person in your organization will work in another company or know someone who works in a company you’d like to consider as a future employer. You want those people to be convinced you are a class act and not the least bit negative about your former employer; that you did not/will not spread harmful rumors about the company, products or colleagues.

People love to gossip and the more negative the gossip, the more quickly it is spread.

• Give only positive reasons for leaving, commenting on what you are going towards, not going away from.
• Stick to the story. Don’t discuss the “real reason” with your favorite colleagues. Human nature being what it is, that reason, the confidential one, will soon replace the “for publication” reason throughout the company and on the street.
• Don’t rant. When co-workers want to discuss their own dissatisfaction, mention only your good experiences and things you like about the company.

THE EXIT INTERVIEW:

Of importance, as mentioned by Lyndsay Swinton author of the blog, The Rest of Us, “…is a mental checklist to run through to remind you how to behave in the exit interview.

• Have I chosen to attend this interview? It’s not compulsory, so if you’ve decided to attend, do so with grace and dignity.
• Will anything change based on my comments? …
• Who will benefit from my honesty?…
• Who will be harmed by my honesty? Remember that bland answers are an option if you’re likely to get upset during the interview.
• Do I want to work for this employer again? Burnt bridges are difficult to repair.”

The possible list of exit interview questions is exhaustive. Be prepared for those which are most likely to trigger a negative or emotional response from you. It is imperative to keep a positive attitude.

The temptation to “let the employer have it” during the exit interview must be resisted in every case. There is nothing you can say that will change their behaviors or erase the reasons for which you are leaving.

While HR professionals honestly believe there is merit in conducting an in-depth exit interview, senior management (your peers) rarely views the actual interview as more than an indication of how you as a former employee will represent your time in service.

Remember too, that when casting aspersions on your soon to be former employer is an indictment of those who chose to stay. Tread lightly and avoid generalizations and a critique of the company as a decent employer.

Don’t be fooled by the questions that ask your opinions about what could be changed or improved. Companies know disgruntled former employees can be a liability and make recruiting and hiring other $100,000+ employees difficult. Thus, they show they care by asking your advice about how they can be a better company.

Chances are, they won’t make any changes and they don’t really care. They ask these questions primarily to make you feel you are listened to and that you might make a difference thereby diffusing some of your anger towards them. Don’t take the bait.

Let all your comments be neutral, innocuous and positive. Remember, every person who reads your exit interview is a prospective reference for your next two jobs. Be on your best behavior and manage your personal PR with finesse. Your next two $100,000+ jobs may depend on it.
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